written by Michael

Christopher Camp
Christopher Petaja

In loving memory to my brother:

Christopher Petaja
12/24/75 – 3/3/19



We Love you so

My Best Friend
and reference to Life

Your laugher and smile
the sound of our Joy

Your strength, pain, and kindness
beats in our hearts

The lift of your spirit
our beacon thru the Dark

Your truth, life, and wisdom
the understanding of your souls.

Your Brother, Michael
Thanks for the Front Seat



Brother’s Ghost

My Brother’s Ghost moves within my soul

Energy with a life of its own

Marveling with awe the sparkle seen in his child’s eyes

Tenderness towards all he loves

My Brother’s Ghost is my new host

Guiding my thoughts and deeds

My Brother’s Ghost, memories of yesterday

Living, Breathing, my new Being

Crying for that left undone

My Brother’s Ghost, the beat of my drum

A curse or gift, neither true

The Blood in my veins

So much to do

I share my heart with a new found friend

Whose been there all along

Time and space illusorily to my Brother’s Ghost

Words unsaid, finished sentences, fill my voice with ease

His spirit shines forward in my new destiny

Don’t you worry my Greatest Bond

Your understanding isn’t long

Fearless kindness left unnurtured

Precious treasure always protected

I’ll love your children and speak your truth

My Brother’s Ghost Eternal Youth

This reflection in my mirror, nothing left to fear

My Brother’s Ghost very near

We were one, always, forever, this is clear.


Written by Michael Petaja and Jim Bryan
Brother's Ghost Music Video

Little Boy

Lost but not found

Where did you go?

Innocent and Dear with Nothing to fear

Eager to please ready to Give

Please, Please accept me

So that I may live

I’ll give you my heart

Offer my soul

Just don’t reject me, I’ll accept any role

My precious little Boy wasn’t equipped for the ride

Deception, Betrayal and hurt rolled with the tide

I’ll smile, pretend, and not make a Fuss

Every passing year I slowly disappear

Little Boy, Little Boy where did you go?

My heart’s not a toydespair without Joy.


Papa, thank you for all you were, are, and always will be

Papa, the way you seen me made my heart light up

Papa, the strength in your embrace made the world feel safe

Papa, your kindness offered me a world of welcome

Papa, your patience gave me a life where it’s ok to be upset

Papa, why did you give me all these gifts of love and treasures of the soul and not offer them to your little boy who lived within

Papa, he needed you too

I would gladly share and give half of it back to him for another day with you, Papa.

Rebirth of Love

Freed from addiction and the misunderstanding of shame

Primitive unconscious programming finally tame 

The Rebirth of Love

This subtle shift, open to the world, what a beautiful gift.